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  • Writer's pictureSteph Davies

Dealing with friendships post cancer treatment.

Join Life after Cancer coach Steph in a workshop on how to navigate and process friendships post cancer.

Welcome to our workshop. Today we're going to spend 20 minutes or so evaluating the friends who drain you and the friends who energise you.

Unfortunately, friendship breakdowns during or after a cancer diagnosis are not unusual. It is a topic we often hear come up in our community WhatsApp group and in our support groups. If you have experienced this, we’d like you to know that you are not alone.

Sometimes you have to step back and assess your relationships, asking yourself -

  • What are you putting into them, what are you getting out?

  • Importantly, over time, does the balance even out?

  • How does the relationship make you feel?

In the workshop we will use the 'radiators' and 'drains' friendship analogy. Essentially the theory is that you can look at your friends and classify them as one of the two - 'radiators' or 'drains'.

Who are radiators?

These are the warm, supportive people in your life that you enjoy spending time with and who energise you. They leave you feeling better after you have spent time with them and they support and radiate you with warmth and energy.

These relationships tend to be balanced and equal and you are grateful for their presence in your life.

Who are drains?

The people who “drain” you, perhaps of your time or your energy. When we are around these individuals we may feel anxious, depressed or 'drained' of our normal reserves.

If this relationship feels like it has become one way, and that should you need them they would not be there for you in the same way, the balance in the relationship is not equal and is unbalanced.

Once you have worked on your drains and radiators, we’ll then create some time for you to reflect on your experience whilst writing a private letter, before clarifying the steps you could take in order to get your friendship to the place you’d like it to be post cancer.

Read more in our blog on navigating friendships post cancer treatment.

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